Tuesday, 13 July 2010

Headaches and misunderstandings

Well really, I mean, how rude! There I am, being a perfect mother and spending quality time with my kids (doing some drawing, talking about some important things like somersaults and toy cars, pretending to be X-Factor contestants), and then BAM! - the headache that's been lingering somewhere in the less sensitive part of my brain suddenly slams into the front of my head and turns me into DRAGON WOMAN. Dragon woman eats her own young. She roars at them, and then she bites their heads off, and devours the rest of them whole.

But children are forgiving, even after they've been chewed up and spat back out.

Adults are less forgiving.

I suppose it's understandable, because a headache cannot be seen, and it manifests itself as pure aggression in the early stages. Adults don't respond well to aggression, so they find it difficult to sympathise with a dragon woman who is scowling at them and snapping at every word they say. I can understand that. I think I have just annoyed and upset Noomski and Jessica with my growling and grumping, even though I was trying very carefully not to say the wrong things. But headaches make our words come out all twisted and snarly, and what I thought sounded like 'hello, y'alright?' quite possibly came out as 'RAAAAAAAAAOR'! So sorry about that Noomski and Jessica. I really didn't mean to be mardy with you - I was not in control of my face or my vocal cords.

I'm alright now - I took my magic headaches medicine, and it went right away within ten minutes :)

Isn't it funny (not at the time) how headaches have different flavours though? Actually, isn't it weird how anything that exists in the mind has different flavours? And smells as well? This evening's headache had an aura of fruit. Like a banana and strawberry smoothie. Sounds quite pleasant, but really it wasn't, because it had a kind of metallic edge to it that made it kind of rusty. But sort of related, how is it that we can remember what smells smell like, and what sounds sound like, in our head? If I think of the smell of a packet of mints now, in my head I can smell them. But I can't actually smell them, I just know what they smell like. Where is that smell? Where is it in my head? What am I actually experiencing, on a physiological level, when I remember the smell of a packet of mints? And the same when we remember a piece of music, for example. We can hear it in our mind, but yet we can't actually hear it. Where is it? There's sound in our brain, but yet it can't be heard. And when we see things in our mind, where are they? I am now picturing my own face, but where am I seeing it? Where is that image? What's it made of?

I think I am bringing on another headache.

That'll do eh?!

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