THIS LITTLE LIFE

!

Saturday, 17 July 2010

Wasted day, but that's alright

Another one. I do try not to waste days, but sometimes it just happens and there's not much I can do about it. The photo shows what the living room looks like right now. Jumping-on-sofa-cushions-on-the-floor is guaranteed to be the default game on days when the boys are stuck in the house. I used to go mad at them, and make them put everything back, and then we'd do something civilised like jigsaws or another equally dull activity. Now I'm mostly a nice mummy, and I let them bounce off their aggression and frustration as much as they like - until someone gets seriously hurt :D And it saves me having to ever plump up the cushions as well - there's usually a laziness motive behind every decision I make, so don't be under any illusion that I always put my kids first: I don't, I always put my selfish self first.

We had visitors today, unexpected ones. For me this is nice, to see Noomski and Jessica, and my dad as well. I like when they all come and have lunch with us, and lots of cups of tea. But the boys do get bored, bless them, because the grown ups are all talking about their week, and the trip to Holly Farm that was promised for the afternoon starts to look less and less likely, and no-one's listening to what they've got to say, and no-one's playing with them or watching their stunning new tricks and moves, and no-one's getting them a drink when they ask for it, and no-one wants to come outside and watch them ride up and down on their bikes, and it's just not fair. I think it goes to show that kids are not so different from grown ups - having toys (for toys for adults read laptops, iPhones, gadgets of all kinds) is all very well, but really what you want is company. I get a bit lonesome at times, but I don't realise that until someone comes to visit and I enjoy their company and slightly more adult conversation. But it pays to remember that kids are good company too - especially mine :D They've always got so much to say, and they can be wise and witty and wonderfully insightful. Really the only time my kids annoy me is when I'm being the selfish and lazy one, and I'm trying to do something that really I should be doing in the evening. Then they get all whiney and irritating, and they start fighting amongst themselves, and they break stuff and throw toys and generally just vie for my attention - well, who can blame them? I can't, because it's not their fault, it's mine. Did I decide to stay at home with the kids to be lazy and to play on the computer and read books? Or did I decide to stay at home with the kids because I wanted them to have a wonderful few years of playing and fun and learning, and to ensure that they were being brought up the way I wanted them to be, the way that they couldn't be brought up if they were in nursery every day (no judgement on anyone else's decisions, definitely not - we all have to do what's best for our families, not for anyone else's!)? Priorities, lost them for a while, got them back now :) This is supposed to be my job, I should start working! These few years were never supposed to be about me, they were always supposed to be about my kids - time to refocus, on them :)

So.

The summer holidays start in three days. *Long and deep steeling intake of breath* I'm ready for it. Well, I haven't done a plan in my diary of possible activities/trips/picnic sites/visits/walks/games to entertain us for the six weeks yet, but I'll get it done. But I am all prepared to stop being lazy - I've given myself a talking to, and long lie-ins and leaving the kids to find something to eat for their own breakfast is not allowed. Getting up nice and early and filling the day with fun things is allowed. Reading/playing on Facecloth/writing blog entries is not allowed until the boys are in bed at night. Watching my own DVDs on my laptop while they watch something of theirs on the big telly is not allowed. Fobbing them off with promises to do something nice tomorrow so that we can do something of mine that's boring today is not allowed. Being grumpy with the boys for no reason that has anything to do with them is not allowed. Being grumpy with the boys because they're being naughty and grumpy is not allowed either - they'll never get out of a bad mood if I just keep throwing it right back at them. Being cheery and making an effort to enjoy every single day of the holidays is allowed - this works, I've tried it before, and the boys end up following my lead. Watching kids DVDs is allowed, as long as I watch with them, and only on rainy days (of which there may well be many).
I've written the rules down now, so I have to stick to them! You are my witnesses. I will be honest, and tell you if I break them.

Time for myself is in the evenings, and there's plenty of it if I just use it wisely. Now, I just need to find the batteries for my camera, so that I can document all of the FUN we'll be having over the next few weeks!

Now I think I have set myself one hell of a task - staying cheery for a full six weeks? I don't think it's really possible, but we'll see.

3 comments:

  1. 6 weeks of cheerfulness - nope!! I have no expectations of this forth coming holidays - I actually think its the reason of my grrryness of late.

    We need to set up a mummies refuge for the 6 weeks holiday, it should be a nice padded cell with on tap optics and wine, comfy seats, wall to wall books and dvd's of our favourite hunks.

    No way are you a selfish mummy Lindy-poos, you are a most excellent mum, I need to take a leaf out of your book!

    ReplyDelete
  2. No-one sees the kind of mummy I am at home Saz :) I am very selfish and lazy, and I've written it in all its horrible truth on here to shame myself into being better. My lack of patience is always the reason some of our school holidays have been disasters - when I plan properly and devote my time to the boys completely we have a fantastic time; when I start thinking what I'm missing out on by being with them then that's when it all goes wrong.

    Come to us one of the days in the first week, and we'll have a lovely time - that'll be one of your days down, one less to worry about :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. As I have said... I can only aspire to be like you :o) I am a meanie lol

    ReplyDelete